How to Train Your Human

By Bear (Canine Guest Blogger)

Hi Y’all! My name is Bear; you may have read about me here on the RPO blog, because my mommy Suzanne loves me and talks about me all the time. She also uses some of her posts to tell tales about me, but don’t you believe a word of it – I’m a good girl!

I’ve taken over the computer while mommy is doing some housework because I have an important message for all you dogs out there. Did you know that you can make your mommies and daddies do exactly what you want them to do?  Whether you want to go out and play or whether you want an extra TidNips™ treat, there’s a way to get it. I know…you thought the humans were in charge, didn’t you? Nope, they are wrapped around our tiny little paws!

The first thing you have to perfect is the sad face. This will make your mommy think that you are sad and need some love. It’s also great for not getting in trouble. I have a hard time controlling my tail wagging when I get excited and I sometimes knock stuff off the coffee table or spill drinks. All I have to do is give mom the sad face and she’ll pet me instead of fussing at me.

The sad face and all of my canine wiles work to make my mommy do whatever I want her to. I figured this out in the kitchen when mommy was cooking dinner. I wandered in the kitchen and sat to watch mommy cook. She kept on doing what she was doing, so I got as close to her leg as I could. That smell was really making my mouth water. I whimpered a little bit to let her know I was there because I know she doesn’t like tripping over me. She looked down and I gave her the sad face, then I stuck my paw up for her to shake it. It worked. Mommy knelt down and took my paw, and she slipped me a little bite of what she was making. Oh YUM! It tasted as good as it smelled. I wanted more!

I put my paw up again but mommy didn’t see it, she’d gone back to cooking. So I nudged her and put my paw up; again nothing. Darn it, I wanted more of that food! Finally I’d had enough of being ignored and I yelled at mommy. She doesn’t like it when I yell for no reason because it makes her jump. She turned and started to tell me to get out of the kitchen, but I lay down and gave her the sad look then turned over so she could rub my belly.  Mommies just can’t resist when you’re being cute and sad and sorry for startling them.

She gave me another little bite, and then she went to the cabinet where she keeps my yummy CANIDAE TidNips™ treats. She put the treats in a little bowl on the stove. I was very excited and got a little pushy trying to get up and see where she put my treats. She told me to sit and shake. I did, and she gave me a tiny piece of a treat. Now I hang out with mommy all the time while she cooks and she gives me a few treats to keep me happy.

My mommy is a responsible pet owner and knows that if she gives me too much “people food” I could get sick, so she makes sure that I have treats that are good for me while she’s cooking. I don’t even have to shake anymore, I just nudge her leg and she’ll slip me some tasty TidNips.

Never underestimate the power of a sad face and a mommy who loves to have a happy doggie! Use every adorable thing you can to convince your mommy and daddy to do whatever you want them to do. The trick is to make them think they want to do what you want. It’s actually pretty easy; after all, they are just humans!

Read more by Bear’s Mom